Jesus is saying, "Let me take you there, Katrina." That's frightening when you hear that and He is addressing issues of your heart. But that is His heart. He is whole, lacking absolutely nothing. As followers of Jesus, we are to/do mirror Him with the stipulation that we are following. We can only do this by being changed from our fallen character into His character. We can only do that by following. If you have prayed any prayer that involves being used by Him, wanting to mirror Him or even having people only see Him when they look at you; He will be in relentless pursuit of making you whole. That is a heavy (for us) and pursuable prayer for the God who wants, will get, and deserves every single ounce of glory. His glory is found by me, by you, going there. Going deep to the places that scare you, possibly even terrify you and letting Him dwell there. He's saying "All that 'comfort' you find in the pain Katrina, will keep you from radiating my glory even more than you do." That, for me, is quite the heavy word from my Daddy. I mean who doesnt want to radiate more of the glory of God, after you have tasted and seen? So following Jesus, means going there. And its going to hurt and I'm going to have to sit and listen for His voice. My decisions are going to have to change. My reactions to the issues of my heart are going to have to be different and will probablly be really uncomfortable, because I am letting go of control. Letting go of my adgenda (my contolling of the situation), of how I will react to the pain that I feel on the inside because of issues of my heart.
Matthew 16:24,25 says "Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." Yes, this was after Jesus told Satan to get behind Him because Peter (of course, oh Peter) tried to tell Jesus that essentially His adgenda was wrong and that going to the cross to die was not what a King should be doing. If I want to be a disciple and walk in the light, I must follow. WHEREVER Jesus is leading. I can't pick and choose, its not my option. His option is the only way. We must go there when He leads.
Jesus, don't allow me (and all of your followers) to run after the things that will put a band-aid on the issues of my heart for a short moment, just to fall off in a short time, leaving the wound open and not healed by you. Do whatever you must, to make my heart free and whole, showing the world that your healing is real and attainable. Take me deeper into your heart to unchain the lies that bind. Set my heart free to love you and love others more.
