Time is becoming a most prized posession for me right now. It has now become the 3rd most important thing in my life behind the Trinity and family/friends. It used to not be. It's not that I never really thought about my time, it was just already all planned out for me. I had things to do and places to be at certain times so I didn't really have that much extra time just floating around to think about. But now I do. And a lot of it.
I haven't had a job in 4 months. I havent been unemployed for that long since I started working at 15 years old. Almost 10 years. I have wasted a lot of time in these past 4 months. More than I wish admitting. I haven't been sitting and doing nothing. If that were the case I would hope at least one friend of mine would kick me in my ass. But then again, I got swift kick right in the rear on friday night, from a friend and we dont even know eachother. We are all friends at Bethel, so I'll just call him my friend.
So I have been challegned. In a bigger way than I ever have been before. Because now, the response is completely up to me. Yes, I do have school which is already scheduled. But I am now coming into my own. It's weird that it didnt really happen in college for me. Things were just there and I saw them and went after it. Now, I have to make things happen. I must seek the things out that I desire to do and be a part of. They aren't just going to come to me. And at some point, they won't just come to you either, whoever you are.
I did so many things during highschool and college. I really thought I knew how to network and be a steward of things. I really think that I knew that. But, it was kind of all just there, for my taking. So now, with no ties in Redding and wanting to grow and build and add people to my life who are on the same track as I am and further along, I have to go out. I have to seek things out for myself. Thats not really easy when most of your life things have just fallen together for you. I feel like I'm starting over. Like I really dont know anything about anything at all. It's a weird place to be. I'm not really a fan of it either. [Man, I didnt even ever have to find my own job! always through someone who I knew - - not saying thats bad but when you start over in a whole new place 1/2 a country away, that makes for an interesting journey].
So here I am, feeling like I know absolutely nothing about life, or at least feeling like i know absolutely nothing about how to go about what to do with my life, or where to even start for that matter. So I have a meeting with Stephen DeSilva this week. The treasure of Bethel and teacher of my stewardship AMT. I'll begin with adding his wisdom to my life an see where this takes me. Time is precious now, so I'm going to suck everthing I can out of the place that I am at. Time ... we don't get it back. Why am I just now getting that?
