Jesus is saying, "Let me take you there, Katrina." That's frightening when you hear that and He is addressing issues of your heart. But that is His heart. He is whole, lacking absolutely nothing. As followers of Jesus, we are to/do mirror Him with the stipulation that we are following. We can only do this by being changed from our fallen character into His character. We can only do that by following. If you have prayed any prayer that involves being used by Him, wanting to mirror Him or even having people only see Him when they look at you; He will be in relentless pursuit of making you whole. That is a heavy (for us) and pursuable prayer for the God who wants, will get, and deserves every single ounce of glory. His glory is found by me, by you, going there. Going deep to the places that scare you, possibly even terrify you and letting Him dwell there. He's saying "All that 'comfort' you find in the pain Katrina, will keep you from radiating my glory even more than you do." That, for me, is quite the heavy word from my Daddy. I mean who doesnt want to radiate more of the glory of God, after you have tasted and seen? So following Jesus, means going there. And its going to hurt and I'm going to have to sit and listen for His voice. My decisions are going to have to change. My reactions to the issues of my heart are going to have to be different and will probablly be really uncomfortable, because I am letting go of control. Letting go of my adgenda (my contolling of the situation), of how I will react to the pain that I feel on the inside because of issues of my heart.
Matthew 16:24,25 says "Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." Yes, this was after Jesus told Satan to get behind Him because Peter (of course, oh Peter) tried to tell Jesus that essentially His adgenda was wrong and that going to the cross to die was not what a King should be doing. If I want to be a disciple and walk in the light, I must follow. WHEREVER Jesus is leading. I can't pick and choose, its not my option. His option is the only way. We must go there when He leads.
Jesus, don't allow me (and all of your followers) to run after the things that will put a band-aid on the issues of my heart for a short moment, just to fall off in a short time, leaving the wound open and not healed by you. Do whatever you must, to make my heart free and whole, showing the world that your healing is real and attainable. Take me deeper into your heart to unchain the lies that bind. Set my heart free to love you and love others more.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Jesus' heart is soft.
I'm angry. Quite frankly I could punch my hand through something and not care how hard it would hurt. It doesn't sound righteous, but it is. Its a righteous anger. An anger that says "I refuse to live on this earth and not cry out and then see with my own eyes God give justice." It's that kind of anger. An anger that cries for justice, reaching the very heart of the holy King.
I just got done with my global health policy class for the evening. We watched a video about HIV/AIDS around the world. KC, Africa, Ukraine, Hati and India. Whole entire families have AIDS in Africa. Some parents have HIV then die and then the eldest child, in this instance a 15 year old boy with 3 sibblings turns into the caregiver. In India the pressure to give your husband a child is so high that when the mother of the husband starts pushing the wife to concieve (when both the husband and wife know that he is HIV positive but are using condoms to prevent the spread) the wife gives in to the wishes of the husbands parents and then they get pregnant. Then she gets HIV and passes it on to the baby.
It showed people in the Ukraine injecting heroin. A woman and a man. The whole young adult generation over there thinks their lives are hopeless and they don't have jobs so about 40% of them shoot up heroin. HIV/AIDS is running ramped. Then some chick in my class was all like "ewe, thats so gross." I got really mad at that that comment. Like angry. All I could think about was how could she think that way? How could she think, "ewe" when clearly there is hurt, pain, people yearing for fulfillment. Then after I got pissed. I thought what a stone cold heart she has. Then I thought, what a cold heart I have. I looked right at her and thought, I had no compassion on her. Yet, I had compassion for the people I had never met. This chick is in my major so I have talked with her a bit before in other classes. Then I was like dang, sorry Jesus, change my heart for EVERYONE. Not just the people who are in horrible living situations, but everyone. Because without Jesus, we are all in a horrible situation.
Proverbs 29:7
"The righteous care about justice for the poor, but the wicked have no such concern."
Psalm 11:7
"For the LORD is righteous, he loves justice; upright men will see his face."
Psalm 33:5
"The LORD loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love."
Psalm 45:6
"Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever; a scepter of justice will be the scepter of your kingdom."
Psalm 89:14
"Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; love and faithfulness go before you."
Psalm 103:6
"The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed."
Psalm 140:12
"I know that the LORD secures justice for the poor and upholds the cause of the needy."
I just got done with my global health policy class for the evening. We watched a video about HIV/AIDS around the world. KC, Africa, Ukraine, Hati and India. Whole entire families have AIDS in Africa. Some parents have HIV then die and then the eldest child, in this instance a 15 year old boy with 3 sibblings turns into the caregiver. In India the pressure to give your husband a child is so high that when the mother of the husband starts pushing the wife to concieve (when both the husband and wife know that he is HIV positive but are using condoms to prevent the spread) the wife gives in to the wishes of the husbands parents and then they get pregnant. Then she gets HIV and passes it on to the baby.
It showed people in the Ukraine injecting heroin. A woman and a man. The whole young adult generation over there thinks their lives are hopeless and they don't have jobs so about 40% of them shoot up heroin. HIV/AIDS is running ramped. Then some chick in my class was all like "ewe, thats so gross." I got really mad at that that comment. Like angry. All I could think about was how could she think that way? How could she think, "ewe" when clearly there is hurt, pain, people yearing for fulfillment. Then after I got pissed. I thought what a stone cold heart she has. Then I thought, what a cold heart I have. I looked right at her and thought, I had no compassion on her. Yet, I had compassion for the people I had never met. This chick is in my major so I have talked with her a bit before in other classes. Then I was like dang, sorry Jesus, change my heart for EVERYONE. Not just the people who are in horrible living situations, but everyone. Because without Jesus, we are all in a horrible situation.
Proverbs 29:7
"The righteous care about justice for the poor, but the wicked have no such concern."
Psalm 11:7
"For the LORD is righteous, he loves justice; upright men will see his face."
Psalm 33:5
"The LORD loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of his unfailing love."
Psalm 45:6
"Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever; a scepter of justice will be the scepter of your kingdom."
Psalm 89:14
"Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; love and faithfulness go before you."
Psalm 103:6
"The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed."
Psalm 140:12
"I know that the LORD secures justice for the poor and upholds the cause of the needy."
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Thow off EVERYTHING
I like to think, a lot. I also like people to think as well ... so I hope you enjoy my thoughts.
This one is for Amy Elizabeth ... because its taken waaaay too long!! ; )
I have been thinking a lot on how my mind can either seperate me from knowing Jesus or can bring me closer to knowing Him. Its quite the topic actually. I like to think I can help people jump into the depths of Jesus. Can I really? I seek Him and I find Him in crazy ways, and He shows me many things that I never knew that I could know. But am I just giving people what I think about Jesus or am I taking them straight to the word and saying this is what Jesus says about God and what He is all about. I think that I do a pretty good job of that but in our society we are individuals, being proud of our own opinions that we form and proud of our race, whatever that is, and our political views and what we are accomplishing in this world ect... ect... Be loud and proud is what I see as an underlying theme in our society. I think that it's ok that we can think whatever we want about any topic we want, because it's our free will. Although it sometimes can affect other parts of our lives, in either a postive or negative way.
After stating that, I think its a terribly wrong way to live when getting to know Jesus. As I think about the things that I already know and what I want to know, I can't help but think, am I missing Jesus b/c I want to have my own opinons and my own thoughts on things? Am I allowing myself to be conformed to the likeness of Christ if I keep persuing my own opinions on how the gov't should be run, or how the poor should be treated, or what kind of people I need to be nice to and which people I shouldn't really care about? Are my "grand ideas" getting in the way of me fully knowing Jesus? Or am I saying "Jesus, you can have it all."
Am I "throwing off EVERYTHING that hinders" as it says to in Hebrews 12:1,2? I actually read an amazing verse for maybe the first time (a small chance that it was the second time) in Joshua. It is right after the fall of Jericho and the Israelites were stealing from God, of course after he told them not to. Oh Israelites, ha. Joshua 7:10-12 says, "The Lord said to Joshua, "Stand up! What are you doing down on your face? Israel has sinned; they have violated my covenant, which I commanded them to keep. They have taken some of the devoted things; they have stolen, they have lied, they have put them with their own possessions. That is why the Isralites cannot stand against their enemies; they turn their backs and run because they have been made liable to destruction. I will not be with you anymore unless you destroy whatever among you is devoted to destruction." --- my emphesis added.
That's a pretty good word right there! What in my life is devoted to distruction? What kind of distruction am I allowing in my life? Yes, I do understand we are in the world, but that does not mean we can just take the "everyone else does it" view and run with it. God clearly states that He can't be around anything that is devoted to distruction. It is not his nature, therefore He will not abide with it. This is not taking away is omnipresence, I think this statement enhances it. God has boundaries, and He will not live near sin, it is not His nature, He cannot do it. So again, what in my life is hindering me from seeing the face of Jesus, hearing his voice and being ridiculously connected to him? Is it what I'm watching, b/c my eyes are the window to my soul. Is it what I'm listening to b/c the ears are a door to the heart. Is it the condition of my heart? Am I filled with bitterness, pride, self reliance? What is it to you? What in your life, is hindering the completion of holiness your inner most being? And why, why do we think that we can get away with just saying "oh this one time won't hurt" when clearly, it does because a man reaps what he sows, in every situation. I encourage you to throw EVERYTHING off that hinders, so that anything that causes distruction in your life will not hinder you from having a passionately deep relationship with the King of Kings.
This one is for Amy Elizabeth ... because its taken waaaay too long!! ; )
I have been thinking a lot on how my mind can either seperate me from knowing Jesus or can bring me closer to knowing Him. Its quite the topic actually. I like to think I can help people jump into the depths of Jesus. Can I really? I seek Him and I find Him in crazy ways, and He shows me many things that I never knew that I could know. But am I just giving people what I think about Jesus or am I taking them straight to the word and saying this is what Jesus says about God and what He is all about. I think that I do a pretty good job of that but in our society we are individuals, being proud of our own opinions that we form and proud of our race, whatever that is, and our political views and what we are accomplishing in this world ect... ect... Be loud and proud is what I see as an underlying theme in our society. I think that it's ok that we can think whatever we want about any topic we want, because it's our free will. Although it sometimes can affect other parts of our lives, in either a postive or negative way.
After stating that, I think its a terribly wrong way to live when getting to know Jesus. As I think about the things that I already know and what I want to know, I can't help but think, am I missing Jesus b/c I want to have my own opinons and my own thoughts on things? Am I allowing myself to be conformed to the likeness of Christ if I keep persuing my own opinions on how the gov't should be run, or how the poor should be treated, or what kind of people I need to be nice to and which people I shouldn't really care about? Are my "grand ideas" getting in the way of me fully knowing Jesus? Or am I saying "Jesus, you can have it all."
Am I "throwing off EVERYTHING that hinders" as it says to in Hebrews 12:1,2? I actually read an amazing verse for maybe the first time (a small chance that it was the second time) in Joshua. It is right after the fall of Jericho and the Israelites were stealing from God, of course after he told them not to. Oh Israelites, ha. Joshua 7:10-12 says, "The Lord said to Joshua, "Stand up! What are you doing down on your face? Israel has sinned; they have violated my covenant, which I commanded them to keep. They have taken some of the devoted things; they have stolen, they have lied, they have put them with their own possessions. That is why the Isralites cannot stand against their enemies; they turn their backs and run because they have been made liable to destruction. I will not be with you anymore unless you destroy whatever among you is devoted to destruction." --- my emphesis added.
That's a pretty good word right there! What in my life is devoted to distruction? What kind of distruction am I allowing in my life? Yes, I do understand we are in the world, but that does not mean we can just take the "everyone else does it" view and run with it. God clearly states that He can't be around anything that is devoted to distruction. It is not his nature, therefore He will not abide with it. This is not taking away is omnipresence, I think this statement enhances it. God has boundaries, and He will not live near sin, it is not His nature, He cannot do it. So again, what in my life is hindering me from seeing the face of Jesus, hearing his voice and being ridiculously connected to him? Is it what I'm watching, b/c my eyes are the window to my soul. Is it what I'm listening to b/c the ears are a door to the heart. Is it the condition of my heart? Am I filled with bitterness, pride, self reliance? What is it to you? What in your life, is hindering the completion of holiness your inner most being? And why, why do we think that we can get away with just saying "oh this one time won't hurt" when clearly, it does because a man reaps what he sows, in every situation. I encourage you to throw EVERYTHING off that hinders, so that anything that causes distruction in your life will not hinder you from having a passionately deep relationship with the King of Kings.
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